eBay women

A poster using this picture is all over the underground at present. We were walking past it with a female friend the other day who opined that she thought it was "the dykeiest picture in London". Interestingly we have had had similar thoughts. It's definitely the presence of the woman on the left that does it, perhaps because she reminds us, somewhat, of Gina Gershon in Bound (1996).  They are not models, anyway, but "fashion bloggers". 

A Viennese Whirl - but not for Triple P

Agent Triple P is feeling rather Viennese and frothy at present because we have been listening to a lot of Johann Strauss.  Now this is not our usual listening at all.  When listening to classical music, as we largely do, we prefer late romantics like Mahler, Sibelius, Rachmaninov, Rimsky-Korsakov, Khachaturian et al.  However we recently found ourselves writing a ballroom scene in our ever expanding erotic story Les Soeurs Croissant  and needed some appropriate music to write to.  As we were in Bucharest at the time we had to confine ourselves to what was on our iPod, which turned out to be just The Blue Danube, taken from a Herbert von Karajan compilation of Strauss music.  We hadn't put the rest of the CD on the iPod, however, and the Blue Danube just reminds us of spaceships so we put aside writing this scene until we could obtain some more Strauss, which we duly did on our return.

Now long ago Agent Triple P loved Johann Strauss and, indeed some of the very first records we owned were Strauss compilations.  In fact, we think that this one (above) was the first record we bought with our own money in about 1970.  Up until this point Triple P's only LPs were a handful of hand me downs from our aunt who had recently got married and passed us her duplicates.  Thus we had a collection that, in total, included, the Beatles' Revolver, Sgt Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band and Magical Mystery Tour.  In addition we had Beethoven's 3rd symphony (still our favourite Beethoven) and Dvorak's New World.

It's odd seen from today's perspective, where music is so ubiquitous that you can carry it around with you all the time, but back in the sixties although most people had record players not many people had any actual records.  Most households triple P visited had perhaps a dozen or maybe even less.  Triple P's parents owned about eight records.  The record player was in the living room so, in Triple P's family, whatever was played had to be acceptable to all.  Strauss caused no arguments and so we soon acquired a second compilation (above).  These records cost 99p at the time so were a big hit on our 50p a week pocket money.  It was only when we got our first record player, which we could have in our bedroom that our record buying expanded.

Triple P does not enjoy dancing and, indeed, we are very suspicious of men who do.  Our view is that it is something you have to endure at a certain age when you are trying to meet girls and it is to be avoided if at all possible.  Most men are bad dancers and those that are good are looked on with suspicion by other men.  Women, on the other hand, are much more likely to have had some form of dance training and so are able to deal with the basics.  Women like men to dance with them but are then very critical of them if they are no good.  We suspect that we have only danced (or an approximation of it) half a dozen times at most and we have to be really drunk to do so.  A girlfriend once took Triple P to a ballroom dancing class in advance of some event and we found it quite impossible to remember any of the sequences of movements needed.  Even though it was just the two of us and the teacher we felt totally awkward, stressed and self-conscious. We did not return for a second lesson!

Last time we were in Vienna we took this picture of the Johann Strauss monument

We enjoy watching good dancing, however, and the waltz can look quite splendid especially when done en masses as seen at the New Year's Day concert in Vienna.  

It is often said that anyone can dance but we actually don't agree with this.  You only have to watch the early rounds of Strictly Come Dancing or Dancing with the Stars to see that some people just can't do it; and these are people who, presumably, think they can or they wouldn't have entered in the first place.  We think dancing is an innate ability, like being musical, having ability in languages, being good at maths or drawing.  While you can improve a little through teaching, if you don't have that basic ability nothing that anyone does for you can help.  It is best just to acknowledge your limitations, therefore! 

So we will enjoy our nineteenth century dance music and just be glad that we weren't around at a time when formal dancing was a required skill in society!

Calendar Girl May: Rachel Stevens

FHM love pop poppet Rachel Stevens so it is no surprise to find her in this year's calendar as well as last year's.  Our entry last year told you everything you need to know about the London lovely.

Still, this gives us an excuse to post a couple more pictures of her.  As we just got her entry in in may we are intending to post June's calendar girl rather earlier in the month.

This year Rachel has revealed that she is back in the studio recording her third solo album.  Excellent!

The Eurovision Song Contest 2012

Greece's Eleftheria Elftheriou and her sparkly knickers

Well, another tragic performance by The UK at Eurovision, as we came second from last (again).   Oh well, one place higher than 2010 when we were dead last.  Having been one of the most successful countries for decades (won 5 times, second 15 times) our performance in the last ten years has been dismal:  last three times, second to last twice, third to last once.

Who knows what came over the person in the BBC who chose 76 year old Engelbert Humperdinck as our representative.  He hasn't had even a modest hit since 1976.  The decision must have been made after a long lunch, we can only suppose.

The BBC puts in a huge amount of licence payers money to this political back slapping contest.  Given that Jade Ewen came 5th in 2009 it can't just be that everyone hates us in Europe (actually we all hate you too, Johnny Foreigner!).  Most other countries field their top artists but, of course, none of ours need the international exposure that these Balkan and Baltic nonentities crave for.  We haven't fielded a major artist since Olivia Newton-John in 1974 and, to be honest, she was still on her way up at the time).

I'm afraid there is only one solution for next year:  the UK's nemesis bomb - One Direction!

Eleftheria Eleftheriou.  Try saying that after three glasses of Ouzo

Personally Agent Triple P's favourite was the repetitively named Eleftheria Eleftheriou and we were surprised that her catchy Europop number and sparkly knicker-flashing rountine didn't place her higher.  It would have been most amusing to see what the Greeks would have done if they'd won, given the cost of mounting the competition!  

Eleftheria is actually a Cypriot and competed in the Greek X Factor.  She was a candidate for Cyprus' Eurovision entry in 2005 and Greece's in 2010.  Interestingly she studied at the University of Surrey in Guidford, just down the A3 from Triple P's house.

We have to say that we can't understand the appeal of the Swedish winner, especially in what was a rather stronger year than recently.

Girl with Panhard

Zakkers has asked Triple P to find a good picture of a pretty French girl with a nice French car and we think that this 1968 advertisement for the Panhard  24C fits the bill very well.  

This was the last car that Panhard built.  From 1968 onwards they have focused on military vehicles, especially armoured cars.

Agent Triple P remembers seeing these elegant cars on his holidays in the South of France in the 1960s and we even had a toy one.

A healthy Olympics

Here's something which you wouldn't see these days; those patriotic chaps at peddlers of death, Rothmans, donating money to Britain's athletes for the 1972 Munich Olympics.

Forty years later, of course, we wouldn't contemplate such a thing. The Olympics are about fitness, health and looking after your body. Wait a minute, isn't the official restaurant of the Olympic site...McDonald's?

Plus ça change, as our little Froggy chums would say...

Calendar Plane of the Month May: Junkers Ju52-3M

First flown in 1930, the Junkers Ju 52 was the main transport aircraft of the German air force right through WW2.  They were used to drop paratroopers in the world's first major airborne operation against Holland in 1940.  The Portuguese used them in action as a paratroop platform as late as the sixties in Angola.  There were also popular both before and after the war as airliners.  Nearly 5,000 were produced of which 17 still exist in museums and another eight are airworthy.

This seaplane version served in the Norwegian campaign in 1940 and later in the Mediterranean.  We've not built one of these (the floatplane version is comparatively recent) but it looks good and purposeful.